Monday, 31 January 2011

Giblets Out For Jesus

Hold on to your hats, for a new cause has reared its head.

The consecration of woman as bishops? No!
The scrapping of the Anglican Covenant? No!
The unmasking of The Church Mouse? No!
Equality of rights for gay men and woman? No!

Oh no, this is far more serious. It affects each and every one of us every single day - that age old question:

Should I or should I not wear clothes today?

That's right ladies and gentlemen, a Christian geezer somewhere Over There is campaigning for us all to cry, in one voice:

Giblets Out for Jesus

Placards will be made and blog campaigns waged. Loosen your supports, lay down your trusses, undo your sock-braces and join me as we walk, nekkit, into war against clothing. 

No, really, there is one such bloke who seems to want to grace our world with his trouser-snake and walnut buttocks, taut abs and arms like girders. He believes that public nudity is not just right, but a right, man. It ought to be noted that he has bolted his horse to the back of his cart, because he has already done time for wandering and flapping in the breeze. He also has a business that depends on people favouring being starkers, so it is little surprise. And yes, this fella is a Christian. 

Now, I can see how this might work in our daily churching life. It's OK for the Archbish, because he could grow his beard and conceal his Archiepiscopal Crozier. A new and inventive way of swinging ones incense could be tested. A place for holding ones hymn book between sing-alongs could also be trialled, but only for the more ample lady of course. Alternatives for The Peace are so far shelved, however. There is certainly mileage in this. 

So, Brothers and Sisters, let us join the Campaign to be Nude in Public; after all, under all our clothes, robes and medical appliances we are really very naked. Shun shame, promote pride. If God can know the secrets of our hearts, he must have seen the rest. I now leave your inner monologue to imagine the practical outworking of this!

(My thanks to Gurdur, a most excellent man, for bringing this to brighten my day)


  1. All those other arguments about clerical shirts, black, grey, sky-blue-pink etc., whether to vest or not to vest, even whether or not to apparel your amice, he has solved them all in one. In this weather, though, I think his orphreys might go blue.

  2. Lead the way, since you think it a good idea. Let's see who follows!

    Brrr But, choose your weather with care, otherwise who knows what shrinkage might occur!

  3. I choose to remain as Gok made me - firmly held in ta very much :-)



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